Turning Point

So here I am at midnight....
typing and filled with so many feelings and things that I am trying to think thru
I can feel the tears building and my eyes burning


Here I am in this world....
Trying to make sense of it all and learning that
some things are just never going to make sense.
Almost as if the chaos is "normal"


I am making all of this harder than it should be.
I am complicating things.....


I don't know how to fix it.

I am all out of answers and find myself tired and exhausted
and feeling all alone.


I know that You are there.
I know that I am the one who has left....
The more I try to find You the more lost and alone I feel.


I cant take another step.
I am done trying to fix it by myself.

Instead, I just want to run into your arms.
I want to feel the strength of your hands surround me and protect me.
I want to hear the gentle whisper of Your voice tell me that You love me.


My heart longs for more....
burns to know you more.
to serve you more.
to love you more.


Again, I have put my trust in something other than your blood.
Something, that has left me crumpled on the floor

Tired
Weary
Broken



I know YOU are the answer.
Nothing short of You is going to help me....
Move me into the place and position You desire.

I am ready to go.
To leave all that I think will make me happy and content....
Ready to truly let it go and follow you....
wherever that leads me.

You know my deepest desires.
You understand my element and what makes me complete better than I do.
Take me there.....

I don't want to waste another moment in this world
A world that is filled with beautiful people
A world that is filled with opportunities

Use me God!
I am ready.....
I will go anywhere...
I will do anything.....
I know the risk that I am taking but also the reward to be gained.

You have so much to offer... so much more then any person or any thing this world can offer.
Everything pales in comparison to complete surrender!
I am there.....

Content where I am.
Understanding that my life is overflowing with blessings.....

But ready for what is next
Longing to grow and learn and be different
Not wanting to waste another second!

I am here....
Listening.
Ready.
Willing.